“But never lose sight of the need to reach out and talk to other people who don’t share your view. Listen to them and see if you can find a way to compromise.”

–General Colin Powell

Do we all agree that we live in the most polarized time since America’s Civil War? Our people seem to be at odds with one another politically, culturally, and religiously. Disagreements abound, and always have, but now it’s all so vitriolic.

Maybe that has always been the case but now it’s just more evident. Today, people are quick to send a text or email, leave a comment, write a blog, or post on social media–so quickly they likely do so without thinking–or at least “counting to ten” first. These communications never go away, a lesson some are learning painfully–especially our young people, whose impulses easily go unchecked.

Our nation was founded by folks bound by a common desire to divorce themselves from an authoritative government. It was then built on the backs, brains, and ingenuity of immigrants of all ethnicities, races, and personal beliefs, giving us a sense of unity–of one nation, under God. There was a time all of that was honored, celebrated even, but not so much anymore.

Clearly, there are differences of opinion. After all, God gave us brains and, I’m pretty sure, expected us to use them. But what’s sad is that compromise has become a “four-letter” word.

Maybe you caught it in the recent Republican candidates’ debate. One candidate was discussing abortion–a seminal issue of our time–and made an impassioned plea for acknowledging the opposing views on it, but suggested that we come to some kind of consensus.

Another candidate immediately retorted, “Consensus is not leadership.” Boom! There you have it. I believe that’s the prevailing opinion of our senators and representatives in Congress. The problem is, without consensus, there’s no progress. Our founding fathers meant for government-directed change to be incremental, but not for it to grind to a halt.

Granted, some are willing to cross the aisle and work through compromise–and they’re quickly rewarded by being labeled “RINO” or “DINO.” Such labels are the result of lazy thinking at best, or demagoguery at worst–meant to be used as a soundbite in the next political campaign.

Compromise is fundamental to not only governing, but also to functioning as a people–a nation dedicated to the notion that we all have free will and individual opinions, mores, and beliefs. Shouldn’t we strive to accept another’s right to an opinion, even if we would oppose that view with every fiber of our being?

All of us compromise in our daily lives. We do it in our marriages, our families, our friendships, and in our places of business. It’s necessary for the success of these institutions. And we do so quietly and naturally, likely without even giving it much thought.

Consensus-building in public life, especially politics, was once the sign of a visionary, a leader. Now, not so much. Now, it’s viewed as a sign of weakness, and that’s just plain wrong.

Are there issues about which we can’t compromise? Of course. Nothing’s likely to change the tenets of your faith, the cultural values you hold dearly, and the ethics that inform your approach to life. That’s true for everyone and we all absolutely have that inherent right.

There is a line on some issues that “we” won’t cross, but neither will “they.” But can’t we approach that line and meet in the middle, where I believe most of us live? At least from that distance we don’t have to yell. We can simply talk, and that’s always a great start!